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Fish Sea and Ocean Jokes..


Q. Why did the eel cross the road?

A. To get to the other tide!


Q. Why did the dog jump into the river?

A. He wanted to chase the cat fish!


Q. If you see a tuna being chased by a dozen sharks, what time is is?

A. Twelve after one!


Q. What happened to Ray when he was caught by the giant squid?

A. He became X-Ray!


Q. What fish has the most money?

A. A loan shark!




Man departing for work sees council employee in white suit entering
flat in morning with his wife .

Returns later in evening only to find his wife in bed and the man
naked in the ward robe

Ah Ha says the husband to the man , who are you and what are you
doing ?!!!!!

Well says the man , I am from the Council Pest Control Section and
investigating this vicious outbreak of Moths in the area ( Scrabbling
for his white suit)

No No I dont believe that for one moment says the husband come clean
who are you and what are you doing you cad !!

Honest Guv , says the man from the Council , Pest control I am here
to investigate this vicious outbreak of moths .

Hmmmmmmmmm Says the husband . How do you explain your lack of cloths

The man looks down and replies " The Buggers"

A Dentist is working late when he hears a noise in his waiting room.

He goes out and there is a man sat reading a 200 year old copy of readers

"Can I help you ?" says the dentist

"I'm not sure" says the man " I think I'm a moth"

The dentist is quite obviously puzzled and says

"I think you need a psychiatrist. I'm a dentist I don't think I can help"

"Your right " says the man and gets up to leave whereupon the dentist says

"Why did you come in here?"

To which he gets the reply

(wait for it)

(keep going)

(it's worth it)

"The light was on"

"People protect what they love."

- Jacques-Yves Cousteau


One thing that ties all marine biologists together is our love the sea, its life and its systems. Even the hardiest of statistics or industry worn marine biologist couldn't deny this somewhere down the line.

A second reason is that the job does come with a certain ore and wonder; We all at some time enjoy being able to say I am a marine biologist

With this in mind its about time we had some decent t'shirts and ways of celbrating this. Sorry, there are no airbrushed dolphins on this site.

How do I become a marine biologist?
We get lots of requests from people wanting to be marine biologists, adventurers or film makers.. click here to find some advice!


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